Mathematics of friendship.........by Meera Gill
Vancouver, Canada, July 5,2021: On this trip with friends, I am realizing that some people are easier to understand and love, while others demand you to spend a little more of yourself in the process.
Building friendships require one to listen. Listening to relate can be hard but even harder is to process what you have heard.
Stirring, awakening, and attaching one's emotion to that of others is an investment process. It requires emotional labor to match the wavelength of others where we can empathize with their struggles and celebrate their victories. It can take a toll on spiritually and emotionally tired people.
One needs curiosity, hope, and zeal for life to nurture relationships. Is the return on these emotional investments the key I am thinking? The outcome of relationships can be anxiety from not understanding what if anything is expected of you to help; to worry for them as you now understand their struggles or is it a joy of being helpful, giving emotional acceptance, validation, the building of trust, or more.
A complicated reflection it requires as I think of my friendships over the years.
A moth on the sliding door screen, struggling to grasp air, interrupted my train of thought. I quickly got up, opened the screen, and helped it escape to its desired freedom.
While my friends are gone to a lake, I have stayed home as I was feeling tired. Sitting back in my chair, I am now thinking what was it that gave me the energy to get on my feet in a split second to help the moth? ..
Maybe it was a sign, a reminder that joy we get outlasts( > more than ) the joy we give by being just kind to others. That’s it.
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Meera Gill, The writer is the founder of NGO 'Our Global Village Charitable Foundation'
meera.gill@ourglobalvillage.ca
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